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Archive for July, 2008

I guess I lost the bet, huh?  I totally forgot to write last night.  I’ve been so caught up with tracking my new computer, I suppose everything else just sort of got pushed out from my mind.

My computer order was completed last Monday and turned over to FedEx.  FedEx in turn, gave me a tracking link and if you know me, you know how obsessed I can become with tracking things.  Yeah, well, I’m neurotic that way.

Anyway, I’ve been checking that stupid link almost on an hourly basis since Monday, watching as my puter goes from destination to destination, winging its way ever closer to my greedy little hands.  Last night, it made it to Hutchins, which is just a stone’s throw from here; this morning, it arrived in Sherman, just outside my back door, and at 7:00 a.m. this morning, my baby was placed in the delivery truck.

O where, O where, where fort are thou, mine computer?  Hark!  what light through yonder window…. oh hell, where the fuck is that truck, anywho?  I’m sitting on pins and needles.  I jump to the window to check at the slightest sound coming from the street.  I’m gonna wring that driver’s neck when he finally gets here.  He should have put me at the top of his list and not half way down.  I think I’ll go clean or something to keep me busy until my slated hour.

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Today was a rather frustrating if not downright scary day for me.  The DQ and her Cuz went to the second Biggest Loser interview — which they made — and I got to keep Zee for a few hours.  I didn’t think it would be that bad since he hadn’t yet taken a nap.  I figured I would keep him entertained for a couple and then put him down for a nap.  Sounds great and quite easy to handle except that stupid me got caught up in the 1 p.m. Lifetime movie and although I didn’t completely forget about Zee, I wasn’t exactly paying attention, so what happened next, you could say, was entirely my fault.

There I was enjoying the movie when in walks Zee from the bedroom off the den.  He has with him a can of air freshner which he is swinging about and the thing is leaking.  All over me.  I grab the can and ask him what the heck is he up to now.  Zee turns those big baby blues on me and oh so innocently says “Gamama, broke.  It broke.” 

Egad!  When a two year old tells you “it broke”, you can bet your bottom dollar it ain’t “just broke”.  But I got up to follow him anyway, dreading what I was going to look at.  Sure enough, it was ghastly.  Disastrously, unbelievingly, fucked.  Zee kindly points the obvious out to me — he had emptied the entire can of air freshner on the bed frame, headboard, foot board, the works.  And it wasn’t just liquidy goop; hell no.  It was this sticky, tacky, chalky white stuff all over the place.  I just stood there and tried not to cry.  Why?  Because this happened to me once before with my daughter, and in case it has never happened to you… once you spray air freshner on wood (real wood, as in Nanny’s antique wood), it doesn’t want to come off.

Let me tell you, I scrubbed with Windex, Pinesol, Formula 409 (wishing they had 410), Mr. Clean Magic Erasers, Orange Glo, Ajax, Brillo Pads (took off some the wood), some spit, and yeah, I think a tear or two slipped in there.  All to no avail.  I was scared shitless, wondering what my dear El Cheapo would say when he took a gander at the mess his beloved Nanny’s furniture had become.

An hour later, I sat on the floor in front of the mess in a tired and distraught heap and bawled.  Zee kindly patted my shoulder and told me, “it okay Gamama.  It hurt?”  Which of course, made me cry even harder.  I wasn’t angry with him since it truly had been all my fault, but I was, beyond a doubt, scared.  I figured I had about an hour before El Cheapo walked through the front door and I would experience a close encounter of the squirmy kind.

Two hours later, long after Zee had left, in comes El Cheapo, looks at me, and I pointed to the incriminating evidence in all its gory glory shining for the world to see.  He took one look at it, looked at all the cleaning bottles and utensils, turned back to me and says, “Have you tried furniture polish?”

“Uh, nooo.  Does it work?”

“Sure!  Here let me show you.”

And just like that, the awful mess went poof!  gone, out of sight.  And I breathed a sigh of relief, and vowed never again to purchase air freshner.

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Here I am again, with nothing much to say.  The maid came over today and as usual, she was late.  People who are habitually late are right up there on my pet peeve list.  Anyway, so she comes over, does a shitty job and leaves me to clean up after her.  I should tell her what for, but I don’t have the heart because I really think there’s something just a little bit off about her.  So I’m looking for someone else because I neither have the time nor the inclination to clean house.  Housework makes you ugly, you know.  It’s a well known fact, and if I’m not mistaken, it’s even been documented — somewhere.

Tomorrow the DQ goes back to The Biggest Loser for her second interview; the one in front of live cameras.  I really hope she makes it, even though if she does, my life will be turned upside down once again.  Since she’ll be gone for 5 months, and my son-in-law’s work hours are attrocious, I’ll basically be raising Zee.  In fact, he might as well just pack up over there and move in with us because the amount of hours he’ll be with me, well, it just wouldn’t pay for him to even go home.  Oi.  I think I was destined to take care of children.  Everybody’s children.

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Well.  I almost forgot to write, but there’s 21 minutes left to this day, so I guess I’m safe.  Today was a nothing day for me.  I basically did absolutely nothing while El Cheapo flitted all over the house doing unusually useful things like painting the balcony, replacing pickets, installing new faucets in the tub, repainting the door to the utility room, touching up the paint where the door installers messed up the wall, did the grocery shopping, and God only knows what else.

Me, I played hookie and didn’t go to mass.  So…

Hail, Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.  Blessed are thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb Jesus.  Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. 

Amen

Times 10.

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My first entry.  I don’t have much to say just yet, but I did get some awesome news.  Seems the DQ and her cousin went and tried out for The Biggest Loser (the TV show) and they both made it.  Sounds interesting but really difficult.

For one thing, you have to be away from your family (as in across the country) for a total of 5 months.  Which means, no phones, no mail, no Internet, no TV, no leaving the ranch.  They do pay you each day while you’re still on the show, but you’re not allowed to have money with you at the ranch.  Seems that before this no money rule went into effect, people were sneaking in pizzas and other foods not allowed.

Sounds like fun, no?  So, the DQ and Cuz made the first cut.  They’re on their way to the next segment which means being interviewed in front of the cameras as in live TV shows.  Ouch.  One thing on the DQ’s side is that she is extremely photogenic.  Well, two things.  She is also extremely charismatic.  Actually both she and cuz are, and I think that’s why they were so well liked by the show’s people.

I’ll try to document the procedings as they happen.

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A bet is a bet

Me and my big mouth did it again.  As part of a bet, I now have to blog every single day for 30 consecutive days.  I never have anything to blog about on a daily basis, so this is going to be difficult for me.  Not that anyone reads this blog except for my friends, but I have a feeling there’s going to be tons of garbage on here for the next few weeks.  This bet starts at midnight, so… until then… sign me

Stupid

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My computer will be ready for shipping by July 25th, and then it will be 3 to 5 business days before I get it.  I guess I’ll have to wait and see since I have no other options.  Being without a second computer is definitely hard.  I find myself turning to the current second one only to rediscover it’s deadness.  This is just so wrong.

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